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I am sorry this is such a long post today. But I never want to leave the path that leads straight to my Father’s arms. I am a beLOVED daughter of a God who is so gracious & loving. It’s His thoughts about me that should have me in tears at 3AM. And even when I start to think negatively about how people perceive me or focus on words spoken about me…the Lord takes a moment to simply remind me whose opinion truly matters. I am so honored to serve a God who doesn’t care what people think/say/perceive about me. He sees me & Steven at our very best, & at our worst. But the truth behind these 877 words typed is…that God knows my heart. And sometimes I let the words of others dictate how I view myself. I have days where I lose sight of who God created & is calling me to be. I am a work in progress, constantly striving to become more like Christ. See, no matter what people think or say, my yoke/His yoke fits me perfectly. The yoke that the Lord molded & shaped specifically for me. We all know growth always comes with a little pain.įinally, I am reminded of my yoke. If I could just put my feelings aside for a moment & listen to the underlying message…I have an opportunity to grow. There is a bigger picture here that God is trying to show me. I wish I could just brush it off but I can’t. The fact that I let those word get to my heart drives me crazy. I feel some days like I’m losing who I used to be. The fact that I was so bothered by the statement made really irritates me. (Isn’t that how marriage is supposed to work?) Even in hard situations when it may hurt. He has a voice, opinions, convictions and he in no way keeps them from me. If anyone has any doubt about my husband’s voice in our relationship …1. I still remind myself of the yoke I am to carry (Christ’s yoke –the yoke that fits me perfectly) often. The Lord really pierced my heart with those words. That’s ours to carry & it simply will not work for them. The preacher went on to say that as a husband/wife it’s not our job to put our yoke on our spouse. I listened to a sermon a year or so after we married that talked about how a husband & wife each have their own yoke. We have strong convictions & when we believe something, we believe it with all of who we are. I have to say that Steven & I are both very stubborn people. You do whatever you can to make the other person happy because you are in a relationship in its fragile stage. There was a time in our lives when I did dictate choices Steven made in his life. Knowing who he was & almost every detail about him as a person. I obviously made the CHOICE to marry him. It has been said repeatedly that I somehow control Stevens behavior in various situations. (I’m being incredibly vulnerable & that was very hard to type.) My character has been attacked time & time again because of people’s perception of my relationship with Steven. And the reason….I didn’t want people to think in any way that I make Steven do things. I cared very much what people thought about it. During the hour I laid in bed wide awake last night, I kept asking the Lord, “why does this bother me so much? I don’t even care if people think I made Steven get the tattoo!” The Lord quickly made me realize that I did quite obviously care. Whether the person meant to do that or not. Every once in a while when I feel my character is being attacked it hurts. I am not a person who typically cares what others think of me. It was something in me that needed to be dealt with.

That is in no way the person who made the comments fault. I literally was up for an hour in the middle of the night almost in tears because of that simple little comment. This was said & I took it however I took it. I just think that the Lord needed to work on some roots of character in me. I don’t think by any means it was meant to be that. But I felt like it was an attack on who I am. When he told me that, I was extremely bothered. Steven mentioned that someone thought I made him get that tattooed on his arm. But alas, he is who he is & he loves what he loves. I just think he could have highlighted the scripture in his Bible or posted the scripture on his Facebook. It’s his prerogative & I knew in advance he planned to get that on his arm. That being said, I don’t like that Steven got another tattoo. I don’t think people with tattoos are going to hell…I just don’t like them for me. I just simply don’t like them for myself. I am obviously married to a man who loves tattoos. However, if you know me at all, you know I am not a fan of tattoos, before you judge me & send me hate messages I’d like to explain. “The man who finds a wife finds a treasure,and he receives favor from the LORD.” For those people who don’t know the scripture off-hand it says, “Proverbs 18:22” is what his arm will forever read. The other day Steven came home with a tattoo.